Natalie Gould
Coach · Author · Retreat Leader
My Story · My Experience · Testimonials · Recovery Journey
Rooted in story, nature, and the conviction that change is always possible.
I’ve spent my life moving between worlds — corporate meeting rooms, commercial bakeshops, and theater stages; Italian cities, Scottish islands, and California farms.
What looks unconnected has a common thread. A thirteen-year career as CFO of a micro-multinational, work in professional theater, time with bakers in Paris, and two years at a retreat center for the Iona Community have all fed a continuous inquiry into how people change, grow, and find their way to a life that feels whole.
In 2013 I bought Sparrow & Crow Farm in Sonoma County, California. I planted an orchard, brooded chicks in my bathroom, and settled into a life tied to land and seasons. Then a Covid infection in 2021 triggered a nervous system disorder that left me severely disabled for more than three years.
Recovery required physical, psychological, cognitive, and spiritual rebuilding. Using somatic and mind-body tools, I made a full recovery, emerging healthier than before the infection.
The experience transformed my understanding of what change requires, and what is possible even in situations that seem impossible.
That transformation is at the heart of my memoir Enough Feathers to Fly , and the foundation of my work:
One-on-one coaching for individuals navigating change, chronic illness, or a desire for deeper self-understanding
Retreats, workshops, talks, and leadership development for groups and organizations.
A monthly Substack newsletter — farm stories woven with practical teachings on healing and becoming more fully yourself.
A little more about me
I am a part-time farmer. I grow vegetables, fruit, and flowers. I spend a great deal of time talking with birds and animals. I enjoy observing the skies and slow changes in my trees. I’ve also lived in San Jose, San Diego, and Santa Barbara. I spent 12 months in the Hebrides in Scotland on the Isles of Mull and Iona and nearly four years in Bologna, Italy.
I am a writer and a seeker of spiritual and philosophical truths. I love hearing and telling stories. I am curious and find delight in learning and discovering new things. I love to laugh, share meals, swing dance, and listen to jazz.
Experience & Education
My thirty-year career has taken me from scenic painter at La Jolla Playhouse and retreat center staff with the Iona Community in Scotland, to operations director for the Bread Bakers Guild of America — including supporting Team USA at the Coupe du Monde in Paris — to thirteen years as CFO of Balsamiq, a software micro-multinational with thirty-five employees across four countries.
Areas of expertise:
Leadership and team development
Organizational change and conflict resolution
Retreat design and facilitation
Writing, communication, and storytelling
Listening, coaching, and drawing out potential
Formal education: BA Theatre Design, minor Visual Arts, UC San Diego — Magna Cum Laude
Informal studies: mindfulness meditation, qigong, the Enneagram, neuroscience, psychology, philosophy, world religions, gardening, cooking, social dancing, and creative writing
From Darkness to Bloom
My Long Covid Recovery Journey
A downward spiral
In July 2021, following a mild Covid infection, I developed severe dysautonomia (symptoms resulting in a dysfunction of the autonomic nervous system). My post-viral condition is sometimes referred to as Long Covid. It also includes a family of conditions like ME/CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome), POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome), and Fibromyalgia.
I was housebound for two years. Life was completely defined by the all-consuming illness. Human companionship, which I craved, in paradoxical cruelty, worsened my numerous symptoms.
It is a punishing, lonely condition. All activity, all stimulus — physical, cognitive, social —worsens the symptom burden. It felt intolerable much of those first two years to exist in either my mind or body.
While I did not plan my death, there were times I did not wish to go on living.
The tools of resilience and adaptability I had collected over the prior 45 years were useful, but not sufficient.
Letting go
The work of recovery was incredibly slow: the entire journey from onset lasted nearly four years. It required great discipline, patience, humility, and developing a deep understanding of the nervous system.
The work involved retraining my nervous system from the bottom up (body-based practices) and the top down (cognitive practices) to rewire my subconscious and unconscious brain. I utilized a variety of tools, including meditation, dietary changes, somatic therapies, spiritual practices, and a variety of psychological tools.
My recovery required letting go and relinquishing control. I learned how to better care for all parts of my person. Every aspect of how I operated in the world was observed, remodeled, retrained, and, where needed, replaced.
It is my greatest life achievement.
Rising up
I would never choose this journey. But I have been changed by it. I would not want to give up the changes within me.
I emerged back like my amaryllis bulb, which sat semi-dormant on my deck for years, and finally bloomed again in a spectacular burst of crimson.
The experience has filled me with gratitude and awe at the great gift and mystery of life.
Through my journey and experience with clients navigating their own wildernesses, I have more than sufficient evidence to say with willingness any situation can be made better. I have witnessed that the darkest times can be a germination for unexpected growth.